Clinical Clarity
Lyrics
Highlighted phrases are titles of songs in the catalog, including this song’s own.
Saturday morning estate sale signs
Handwritten arrows crooked like spines
A whole life staged on folding tables
Years collapsed into what’s still portable
Manuals stacked for machines long gone
Warranty slips outliving the jobs
Half built shelves extra screws
Projects paused like a
Sentence cut mid use
Paperback novels cracked once then shelved
Notes in the margins talking to self
Every later penciled in light
Like time was a boomerang
Meant to come right
Garage smells like oil and delay
Tools bought for a different day
Not broken plans just ones that waited
Till waiting quietly became dated
Chairs worn into the shape of backs
Comfort leaves dents you don’t notice fast
Nothing tragic nothing loud
Just momentum thinning out
I held a watch face scratched thin
Second hand pacing in place
Perfect rhythm nowhere to go
Effort circling without motion
I’m not scared of dirt
Or names on stone
That ending’s clear that part’s known
I’m scared of the years
That idle clean
Like a screensaver hiding time unseen
Fear ain’t death death’s direct
Fear’s a life kept antiseptic
Breathing steady pulse behaves
Days in storage marked as safe
I don’t wanna grow
Old just passing time
Like a train idling at
The end of the line
If it ends let
It end mid move
Not archived not labeled not gently used
I don’t wanna grow
Old just filling rooms
With proof I stayed smooth avoided bruises
If I’m Still Here let
It show I tried
Not that I waited it out inside
Same house same driveway same
Turn of the wheel
Same pause before answers same scripted appeal
TV keeps talking so silence won’t speak
Furniture mapped to the
Paths of their weeks
Nothing is wrong that’s the part
That alarms
Life set gentle no friction no harm
Days fit together like standardized parts
No sharp decisions no splintered starts
Photos smile like they’re
Trained for the frame
Never explain what it
Costs to stay same
No visible wreckage no
Debt on the skin
Just the slow trade
Of hunger for discipline
I catch my reflection in
How they move time
Not old just settled
Inside of the line
Weeks pass clean no resistance no dent
Calendar full nothing urgent is meant
Not scared of aging I’m
Scared of the slide
Where fine becomes permanent doubt gets retired
Where comfort stops asking what
Else I could be
And stillness gets credited falsely as peace
Everything ends up as counted effects
Lives summarized without context
What time can’t price
Can’t tag can’t shelve
Is the push you abandon convincing yourself
Estate sale future I see it advance
My life shrink wrapped
In a storage stance
Hard drives boxed with unfinished thoughts
Plans archived under too busy slots
Time don’t warn it just normalizes
Slow erosion framed as compromise
Days get clean but the signal drops
Motion reduced to maintenance costs
Breath stays steady ambition starves
Pulse still ticks but it barely argues
Heart still works but it stopped demanding
Anything risky sharp or unbranded
I don’t want calm
If it costs me reach
Don’t want peace
If it dulls my teeth
Don’t want safe
If it sands me flat
Till I fit real nice
Where I’m finally packed
I want days that resist me back
Want friction strain in the mental rack
Want nights where sleep
Won’t come on cue
'Cause the future still feels unresolved
And true
Rather choke on pace than suffocate neat
Rather limp forward than polish retreat
If I’m exhausted at least I moved
If I collapse let
It be mid pursuit
When they inventory what’s left of me
Let it read like velocity